In the most USC move ever, the Trojans hired Lynn Swann as their new Athletic Director on Wednesday; a move in which our pals at Conquest Chronicles called the hiring of a figurehead.
Even USC's official tweet announcing the hiring backs up that claim:
OFFICIAL: Lynn Swann named USC's next Athletic Director. #FightOn pic.twitter.com/NU6n4AgYHi— USC Trojans (@USC_Athletics) April 13, 2016
Southern Cal has a history of seemingly blindly hiring alums to fill important positions they aren't qualified for, and this looks like another one of those instances.
USC president Tommy Trojan Statue is just doing what's best for its university. Board members Fight On [Repeat] and Pete Carroll Photo agree— Jason (@JasonKirkSBN) April 13, 2016
So what would Arizona look like if it operated in this way?
Our current A.D. is an ASU alum. Like, could you even imagine USC hiring a UCLA alum? Could you imagine the backlash from all the Tommy Trojans out there? What would Pete Carroll think? What would Matt Barkley tweet?
Let's pretend for a minute that Arizona would only hire famous alums that played sports to fill important positions at the University. Who would the next few Athletic Directors be? Here are the headlines that would happen:
2016: Bob Elliott to run Arizona Athletics
Elliott, who is 60 years old, is actually four years younger than new USC A.D. Lynn Swann. Elliott may have too much experience, running an accounting firm in Tucson. But he was an announcer, just like Swann. So many similarities. Elliott just hasn't tried to run for Governor yet.
2021: Elliott replaces Elliott as Arizona A.D.
Another analyst-turned-AD as Sean Elliott returns to Tucson to run the athletics department that retired his number in 2005. And what other school can claim that their two all-time leading scorers have been heading athletics back-to-back? Peak
USC Arizona. Terry Francona made a great hire here.
2026: Steve Kerr leaves Warriors for new challenge
After winning 12-straight NBA Championships with the Golden State Warriors, and having gone undefeated every year since 2019, the former Arizona star is bored with coaching, so he's going to replace his teammate as the athletic director at U of A, just because that's what Kerr told current Arizona president Tedy Bruschi.
2031: Rob Gronkowski to captain Arizona's ship
After turning the annual Gronk Cruise into the world's largest company, Rob Gronkowski is ready to bring the pool parties straight to Arizona Stadium, agreeing to become the new A.D. for the Wildcats in exchange for replacing the suites with pools and jacuzzis. Current head coach B.J. Denker gave his seal of approval once the change was announced. Probably because every five-star in the country immediately committed to Arizona